How do I shift limiting or negative beliefs so that feel worthy of and manifest my desires?
The biggest shifts I made in my limiting beliefs and largest strides as a person came right after I ended a relationship with my girlfriend of 7 years and she started dating one of my best friends soon after.
I decided from then on I was going to become the best version of myself I could. I was going to find forgiveness for both of them, realize they did nothing wrong. I was going to get over the pain quickly and I was going become EPIC. I handled the beliefs that were holding me back in a very systematic way.
I had a ton of limiting beliefs. I didn't feel like any woman would want to date me, I didn't think I was attractive, I had low self-esteem, I didn’t feel like what I said mattered. I thought I was a horrible speller and a bad writer.I was shy. I had a hard time calling the pizza man on the phone to order for fear of being judged. I was impatient and I let my health go down the drain. I felt stupid and at war with the world.
I decided I would do whatever it took to change. I downloaded torrents (couldn’t afford them at the time) of all the Tony Robbins and Brian Tracy tapes I could. I would listen to them in my headphones as I walked in nature. They jazzed me up. I became obsessed.
Each day I would listen to Tony’s Hour of Power tapes or Brian Tracy’s Psychology of Achievement. I let these beliefs rewire my thinking. I downloaded Deepak Chopra, Wayne Dyer, Stuart Wilde. And I got a scholarship to Philosophers Notes by Brian Johnson. I listened to them all. I read all the self improvement books I could get my hands on.
I fed my mind with new ideas and new beliefs until the old ones I had just didn’t make sense any more. It helped me know that I really can accomplish anything. That it is up to me to choose who I wanted to be and that I could become anything I could see in my mind's eye.
Each day I would go out to the trails and walk a little farther. I’d run a little more often. I learned about diet and got a weight bench in my attic. From Brian Tracy’s Psychology of Achievement I knew there was an order I needed to master my life in.
I needed to dial in my health first. Then I needed to figure out my relationships. Then I could focus on making money. This order focused my attention. If things got rocky I would return to my health, then my relationships and I would never sacrifice either of these for money. I knew money would come if I handled these areas first.
First I got my health dialed. I was 225 lbs. eating Qdoba playing online poker all day. I started moving a little more and eating a little better. I learned about nutrition and I practiced what I learned. I set the goal of achieving a 5% body fat and eventually lost 70 lbs. to get there before setting a goal of getting stacked.
I signed up for Tough Mudder and trained my ass off. I listened to motivational material every single day. I worked harder the next day than the last. Once I dialed in my health I started working on my relationships. I watched Real Social Dynamics videos and learned about women and what drives human behavior. I learned to love myself and push my comfort zone.
I went to the bars most nights of the week (to push myself in social situations, not to drink) and forced myself to get over my fear of strangers. I approached people I didn’t know and I talked for them as long as possible. I sucked at conversations I was nervous and awkward but I knew the only way to get better was to push through it. To look dumb and to fail. I knew if I kept trying eventually I would figure it out.
I actually got really good at meeting strangers. I developed high self-confidence because I put myself into so many awkward situations that I knew I could handle anything life threw at me. I won bar fights.I got good at meeting and dating women. I developed reference experiences that I was valuable, attractive and worthy. These helped me shape a new self-concept which helped drive new reference experiences.
It takes filling your head with the right ideas and taking the right actions. You shift your self-image and develop reference experiences that reinforce it. It takes pushing your comfort zone and facing what you are afraid of.It takes time. It takes persistence. It takes loving yourself enough to try.
In all my years of developing myself I’ve found some very powerful shortcuts. They can cut years off your journey. Giving them to you is what this course is all about.
Haley: Limiting beliefs are easily shifted.You simply take the negative belief you hold and turn it into a positive affirmation. Let that affirmation become your mantra. Write it on a sticky note and post it on your bathroom mirror or somewhere you will see it right away in the morning.
When I was doing this I had sticky notes all over my house. I flooded myself with positive statements until it just became how I thought. My mom and my dad always had motivational sticky notes on their mirrors growing up.
Today I have a chalkboard in the middle of our home and it always has a positive message on it. I also love using our fridge magnet alphabet to spell out positive notes.
When you notice yourself holding a limiting belief write out the opposite of it and post it somewhere around your home. Here are some examples:
Limiting Belief → New Affirmation
I have to trade my time for an hourly wage. → Money comes to me in unexpected ways.
I am not lovable. → I love myself, my laugh, my smile.
I can’t kick this habit. → I crave a healthy lifestyle.
This song will help set the mood for the course. Tomorrow we'll talk about how much (and what kind of) effort is required to manifest what we want.
P.s. Each lesson has a discussion section under it. You can ask any questions you have there and I will respond to them. Also feel free to comment on and read the questions from other people participating in the course so you can help each other accelerate.